Surrender your will and you’ll get everything you want
Wow, it’s been a while since I have connected via this blog. Truth is, I’ve been having a lot of fun. I’ve been living my life to a whole new level since the last three years of hardship (due to my concussion). Since February 4th, something big shifted in my life: I’ve got my health back!
You might remember (or not), my last blog post, around January. I wrote about my decision to surrender to the fact that I might be living with a permanent health condition. I finally accepted not just that, but I welcomed my concussion to be a part of my life. It was a liberating moment, where I was able to accept myself fully and love all aspects of myself (including those aspects that I judged as “bad”, such as my health condition). By that point, I’ve tried every treatment I knew of, spent thousands of dollars to improve my health and countless hours doing recovery treatments.
I thought that there was nothing more that I could do, and that would be it: I will always suffer from the symptoms that left me fatigued constantly.
I won’t lie, I felt sad about it, but I was ready to accept my life “concussed”.
The next day, after I truly let go, I received a phone call from Jill, from One Hit Away Foundation. Jill has been guiding me throughout the last years to the right doctors in Austin and holding my hand as I navigated my recovery in a new city, far from my home in Hawaii.
Jill made a connection with the Amen Clinics and told me that I was offered the opportunity to get treatment in San Francisco to figure out what else needed to be done in order for me to heal and have a “normal” life again.
They flew me to San Francisco and I’ve got brain spect- scans performed and many tests during several days.
Finally, the results came back. My doctor said:
“You have a beautiful brain”.
That was the best compliment towards my physical self that I received in my whole life. I was truly afraid that they were going to find massive-incurable injuries in my brain (boy, I hit hard with my board on that 40-foot wave!). But no, seems that the 360 hours of Hyperbaric Oxygen treatment at the chamber I had at home, healed my brain to a great extent.
Yet, I still had symptoms that were not allowing me to go through a normal day without fatigue, anxiety, sometimes depression and again…exhaustion. I used to “crash” throughout the day and could barely get things done (for a whole three years).
I was given a new action plan to improve on those symptoms: I’ve drastically changed my diet and eliminated any inflammatories that interfered with my optimal brain function (goodbye sugar, dairy, gluten alcohol and anything processed!).
I started taking new supplements that literally “lifted” my depression from one day to the next. Since February 4th, I felt that I found my light again.
That light that I thought I’ve lost forever, was shining bright and stronger than ever.
What happened in the months that followed since February, was a mix of discipline and enthusiasm towards my health plan and mostly, coming back to life after three years in a personal hell…
I started exercising (because I wouldn’t crash so much anymore), going outside daily, spending time with my closest and new friends in Austin and when I felt that I was strong, happy and centered to be able to make the right decisions (such as, not throwing myself in big waves!), I went back to Hawaii.
After 14 months far from the ocean, I was back home.
I had the time of my life in Hawaii. Not because I was in paradise once again, but because I was different than before.
Not much in the island had changed, but I was totally transformed.
I was light-spirited, grateful, joyful, aware of myself and connected to the Loving energy of spirit. It was amazing to return to a place that I left at my worst to now find myself there healthy, strong and happy. The ghost of my old- concussed, self, was gone.
It all started in January when I decided to accept myself just as I was. I welcomed the concussion to become a partner for life. I stopped fighting myself and my health condition. I embraced it all. And the gates of heaven opened up. The grace that I feel in my life is beyond anything I could express in writing. It’s always there, moving, expanding and guiding me. All I have to do is relax and allow it all to unfold.
In absolute gratitude for having you be a part of my life,
P.S: Keep an eye on your inbox, because very soon I’ll share with you about my upcoming Surf, Dance & Welllness Retreats in Hawaii. These retreats are for women who need 8 days of restoration, fun, adventure and spiritual insight. For those who had gone through the “heavies” and are ready to step into the “lighter side of life”. The adventure has just begun! Hell to the Yes!
Featured image by Anna Riedel- IG: @annariedelphoto
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